Hey y’all. It’s been awhile, and I’m really sorry for that. But… I’ve had a lot going on in my life, not all of it good.
Here’s the big confession… I have chronic migraines.
That doesn’t sound very dramatic does it? I know. We live in a world where no one just has a headache anymore, it seems that headache is just too “weak” of a term and so it seems like now the world is filled with people having migraines or casually saying “Ugh this is giving me a migraine”. I wish.
I have crippling migraines, in that when I get one – I am completely unable to function. I cannot work, I cannot write, I cannot read. I cannot cook, or clean, or take care of my family. The only thing that I can effectively do is lay in my bed, with my head under a pillow, in complete silence (even the sound of a fan is too loud) and darkness. Needless to say, this doesn’t make living easy.
If you’ve never had a migraine – consider yourself lucky – you may not really understand what a true migraine is like. I think it’s hard to really explain pain to someone, since it is so subjective, but I would imagine if you take the worst headache you have ever had, add in extreme sensitivity to light and sound, blurry vision, and extreme fatigue and you’d have one of my migraines. These aren’t the kind of headaches that a couple aspirin and 20 minutes can fix.
People who do have migraines – or have close family members or friends who do – always are quick to offer suggestions… get Botox, use essential oils, get accupuncture, drink the blood of virgins on the 3rd full moon of an even year (okay, maybe not that one) – and I do appreciate their concern and suggestions to a point. Migraines are distinctly individual, and that’s one of the things that makes them so frustrating (at least according to my doctor) because there is no one size fits all treatment… but man, I wish there was.
I am so tired of never knowing if I am going to have to cross another day off my calendar because I was stuck spending my day in silence. I am so tired of trying new medications and treatment options, thinking I found a “cure” until I am felled by yet another migraine. I am so tired of telling my daughter to be quiet because I have a headache, or apologizing to my husband for another fend for yourself dinner, or letting my co-workers down because they are having to pick up my slack because I couldn’t go into work.
And to you – you lovely people who have come here to read my little blog and see my recipes – I am sorry I haven’t been around much for you lately. But, I am going to do better.
I have big changes in store for my little slice of the internet – more posts about my life, my thoughts, and my opinions, more talk about books and what is new and exciting, more recipes, and an entirely new venture for us – building and decorating a house!
Thank y’all so much for sticking with me through this. Your support means the world to me. <3